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Reviews for The Succubus

NeoQBirdie2005.04.14 - 04:55AM2: Chapter TwoSigned
Hello, I've just read the first two chapters. I wanted to tell you that I think your writing style is very nice, but this fic would have been immeasurably better if it was set another five to ten years later in the timeline. A mid to late twenties Granger would (1) have more distance from the students, and as such be on much more equal footing with Snape, (2) be much more ensconced as a figure of authority at the school and (3) add an air of plausibility to the fic itself. Especially when you write in such a condoning headmaster. It's really quite disturbing to read him so enthusiastically supporting a teacher/student relationship. The fic becomes even less plausible in the assumption that Granger is going to somehow graduate early and immediately become part of the Hogwarts staff, and further, this somehow makes everything ok.

Just for clarification, putting an 18 year old in such a postition of authority would not only fail miserably, but also would not automatically grant her equality with the actual ADULTS on staff. However feel free to ignore me if you wish. You seem to have gotten enough of a following to justify your convenient use of illogical plot devices. I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that you've gotten better in your later chapters, since I can imagine you've received a few other reviews like mine, and I'm a little too nauseous to read any further at the moment. Cheers to your future endeavors, which I honestly do look forward to reading.

~Birdie, who meant no offense by this review, just constructive criticism.

Author's Response: No offense taken. I like any reviews that I receive. However, I will tell you to stop reading right now. This is a 50 chapter fic, and if you are this displeased with the first 2, then you might as well quit.

1. I don't want distance from the students. They are part of the storyline.

2. There is nothing wrong with her learning from Minerva this half year and taking over the next year. She can handle it.

3. I was able to get out of my own high school early midterm because I had enough credits. This is completely plausible and wow! it's even done in the Muggle world.

Now, here is a little constructive criticism for you. You've read 2 chapters. Don't you think some of your questions will be answered or you mind will be put to ease as you read on? Of course Dumbledore is supporting the relationship. He doesn't want anything 'bad' to happen to either one of them, which if you'd read thoroughly, you could see that possible death could result.

I find reviews like this to be helpful mostly, but I would ask that you not be so quite rude. I really don't like reviewers that review in the first chapter or two saying something about the entire fic and raise questions that are already answered. If they read, they would know instead of just trying to find something to whinge about just for the sake of trying to sound arrogant. And, yes, my 'plot' devices must work well as I do have, as you pointed out, a good following. Alas, though, you are the only one to worry about her completing her courses early.

I personally like stories when Hermione is still a student and Severus is a professor. A great deal of the ones that I choose to read are set while she is still at Hogwarts. If that doesn't sit well with you, I'd suggest that you move on. This will ensure that you won't be 'nauseous' and what not. I would also suggest you email the author if you're going to be ugly and tell them that theif story makes you sick. That's pretty fricking mean to put that out there amongst 1300 or so other reviews that like the story.

Cheers and good luck in writing your own fics.


warlock_vader_692005.04.13 - 05:49PM32: Chapter Thirty TwoSigned
another good one

Author's Response: thanks, sir. and I appreciate you coming back to review them all hehe... you really don't have to, but I think it's adorable anyway :) xooxox

warlock_vader_692005.04.13 - 05:28PM31: Chapter Thirty OneSigned
wow that was fun

Author's Response: thanks

warlock_vader_692005.04.13 - 04:36PM30: Chapter ThirtySigned
harry never thinks he just goes

Author's Response: you go it

warlock_vader_692005.04.13 - 04:31PM29: Chapter Twenty NineSigned
sad

Author's Response: yep poor percy and luna

warlock_vader_692005.04.13 - 03:44PM28: Chapter Twenty EightSigned
marrieta - yuk dont like her in canon either

Author's Response: me either

warlock_vader_692005.04.13 - 03:36PM27: Chapter Twenty SevenSigned
kinky kinky all of them lemons are always good

Author's Response: indeed hehe

warlock_vader_692005.04.13 - 01:45PM26: Chapter Twenty SixSigned
bellas back in town

Author's Response: uh huh..and will stay a while

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