Fantastic way to introduce Snape. The writing very cleverly hinted at the real possibility of it being Snape, but at the same time you've invented characteristics and manners of speech for him that could easily be attributed to a new character. He was trying to conceal himself, I imagine. It's not that he's out of character, at all, but he is a lovely blend of canon Snape and something lovely of your own. And he seems very old. Not just because he's ill, but because of how he speaks. I like how you've aged him is what I'm trying to say.

Really engaging dialogue between them, and the concept of these "wraiths" is very interesting. I cannot wait to learn more!

Author's Response: Hi there! Thanks for the review! The introduction of Snape was difficult; I did not want it to be immediately obvious it was him, but then again my writing instructor told me what I know is going on and what readers pick up on are two different things (he also told me that my subtlety borders on obscurity...). I tried to keep a bit of his personality there, but mixed in with the troubling aspects of malnutrition, isolation and psychological stress. This Snape really is older than the one we know--not physically, but emotionally. There is much more to learn in upcoming chapters; I'll try to get the next one up by the weekend! Lurve, Meggory

"The streets of Impure I Residence Area Five, known by its inhabitants as the East Ghetto, were clear of rubble but littered with people. The din of children crying and people yelling from windows to the street made up for the eerie silence of the adjacent Oxford transport corridor. The people here made up for the gray skies and dusty buildings with eye-wrenching combinations of coloured clothing. Some days the mixture of oranges and yellows and aubergines made her want to laugh until she remembered the necessity of warmth over fashion. Spaniels ran freely with the shouting children, but cats were seldom seen except in shady alleys were the desperately hungry roamed. Of course, without natural predators, rodents scampered fearlessly underfoot. Her ground-eating pace slowed to a meander through the crowds, and she tried not to breathe too deeply. The salty, musky scent of unwashed bodies attacked her anyway."

You've aged a canon Hermione very well under these conditions. I admire her and already care about what happens to her, what happens to your wizarding world. Your evil is so convincing. Malfoy really gives me the creeps in a way that Rowling hasn't yet quite managed, at least for me. Dobby's execution was so quick and horrible.

Truly some of the most original and wonderful writing I've come across in this area of fandom. Thank you so much for writing! And now I'm still a chapter behind. To chapter 3, I go!

Author's Response: Thanks for the review! There is much more evil, creepy Malfoy to come (in Chapter 5, I think--wait, I think? Shouldn't that be something I know?), so keep reading. Lurve, Meggory