A/N: Before reading, I recommend you take the test depicted in this story. It’s quite simple. Jot down your favorite color and three adjectives that describe it. Then do the same with your favorite animal (which can be a mythological animal or a stuffed toy if you prefer). You’ll discover the meaning of your responses at the end of the story. Enjoy!

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Professor Granger strode into the Potions room without knocking and pulled a quill from her hair, letting the wild mess tumble down her shoulders. She smiled at Professor Snape when he looked up from his desk. A casual flick of her wand transfigured it, essays, quills and all, into a low table set with tea. “How was your day, dear?” she asked with a mischievous smile.

Severus merely sighed and gave her a long-suffering look. He would never let Hermione know how much he treasured the endearments she lavished on him. “I find your attitude completely unprofessional, Professor Granger. What exactly do you want?”

“I’m gathering statistics for some important Arithmancy sequences, and I was hoping you would complete a simple survey for me.”

He looked down at the coffee table that was once his desk and realized that, despite her sweet tone, he had little choice in the matter. “Get on with it, then.”

The eagle-feather quill was now perched patiently over Hermione’s Muggle clipboard. She cleared her throat to speak. “All right, Severus. It’s a relatively simple questionnaire, but it reveals a great deal about oneself. First, what’s your favorite color?”

Severus lifted a brow and made a sweeping gesture over his robes, pants, boots, cloak, and hair. “Are you seriously asking me this?”

Hermione pressed on, unwaveringly, “Now think of three adjectives that describe your color.”

Severus rolled his eyes sardonically and pursed his lips for a moment before answering reluctantly, “I suppose one might describe blackness as mysterious, deep, and… menacing. Hermione, I really don’t see how this pertains—”

“Hush, now! Just one more question, you insufferable man. What is your favorite animal? A serpent, no doubt.” Was that a trace of disappointment in her voice?

“Well, actually—I mean—yes, a serpent. Definitely.” Snape shuddered inwardly at his near slip-of-the-tongue.

“Come now, darling. If you aren’t honest, I won’t get accurate results. I promise not to make fun.”

Severus glared at Hermione for a long moment, then paused to sip his tea. He was about to speak when he suddenly noticed a faint metallic aftertaste. “You didn’t!” he roared. “Veritaserum?!”

Hermione had the decency to blush slightly, but answered him defiantly, “We’re only even now. I seem to recall a certain Potions Master slipping a sleeping draught into my wine a few nights ago.”

“Out of concern for your own well-being! Perhaps if you learned to pace yourself,” his voice trailed into an indignant murmur, “studious to the point of self-exhaustion, completely different circumstances…”

“Severus, what is your favorite animal? And kindly give me three adjectives to describe it.”

Severus struggled valiantly against the effects of the potion, but was finally worn down and answered through gritted teeth, “The lioness,” he groaned in embarrassment. “It is clever, fiercely protective, and beautiful.” Beautiful?! Snape could feel a blush down to his toes. He stood quickly, ready to bolt.

Hermione stood as well, grinning widely, and wrapped her arms around Severus’ neck, stretching up to kiss him. He stood shocked for a moment, then his shoulders relaxed and his arms somehow wound themselves around her waist, pulling her in and deepening the kiss. Perhaps he would make a fool of himself more often if this was the outcome.

Finally, Hermione broke the kiss and nuzzled into his neck, one hand idly tracing caresses over his chest. “Don’t you want to know what your answers mean?”

“Oh, all right, do tell. They must’ve been quite revelatory for the responses they elicited,” he smirked and kissed the top of her head.

“Well, the color and its adjectives represent the way you view yourself. The animal and its descriptives represent traits you seek in a lover.”

Severus’ eyes widened. “Sneaky little witch!” He lifted Hermione into his arms before she had time to protest and swiftly headed for his private quarters.